Yesterday I finished reading Gary Scheiner’s new book “Until there is a Cure“. I will be writing about it in more detail later this week but one thing struck me as I read–diabetes is hard work! As I have mentioned numerous times, I have been at this game for over 13 years now. I should kind of have an idea of just how hard this diabetes thing is to handle but seeing it in print made it worse.
I was tired and overwhelmed by what I read. I worried about my son once again. There were complications to concern yourself with as well as preventing complications. There are reading before you eat and after you eat. You need to try to eat lower glycemic food (I am only just figuring out how the glycemic index works after years of a mental block of the concept!). Some times you should graze, sometimes you should pre-bolus, sometimes you should….throw your hands up and say I can’t do this!!! I am not a pancreas! I am not God!!! I am just a fallible person!!!
Yes that was my foot stomping, with childlike screams, and ranting on my sleep deprived Monday! Now granted after making me feel inadequate, overwhelmed and an underachiever, Gary notes the many great online resources out there. He never suggested that I am a failure. He doesn’t judge or say that you have to do this, this and this or else but just reading about the various types of insulins, meters, trending software, complications, and preventative care initiatives, I was exhausted and sad.
Diabetes asks so much of us. People think that diabetes management means that you inject once a day, avoid sugar, and lose weight. That’s no big deal. Those of us who live with diabetes know the real story. Parents of children with diabetes have the added grey hair, extra wrinkles and bags under the eyes to prove it!